AVA R U OK? Day 2023 – I’m here to hear
15 Sep 2023
For over a decade, the premise that ‘a conversation can change a life’ has been the driving force behind R U OK?, encouraging people to stay connected and have conversations that can help others through difficult times in their lives.
On R U OK? Day 2023, the AVA community heard from Andrew Thompson, veterinary nurse and accredited Mental Health First Aid Instructor, who began with a thoughtful acknowledgement of those living with mental illness, those we have lost and those who support people who are struggling with their mental health.
A snapshot of mental health in Australia reinforces his statement that “we are not alone”:
- 1 in 6 Australians have experienced suicidal thoughts or behaviours in their lifetime
- 1 in 2 Australians have experienced a mental health condition in their lifetime
- 1 in 5 people aged 16 to 34 reported high or very high levels of psychological distress
- Almost 2 in 5 people have been close to someone who had taken or attempted to take their own life.
Using the ‘ALEC’ scaffold, Andrew shared practical tips, personal experience and resources to help those who may feel unsure about starting a conversation around mental health and wellness. He noted how important it was to be aware of what might be happening in other people’s lives and the need to first prepare ourselves for a conversation.
The ALEC framework involves four steps:
- Ask R U OK?
- Listen
- Encourage Action
- Check In
When it comes to starting a conversation with a friend, colleague or family member, Andrew shared a number of ways you might ask R U OK?:
“How are you travelling?”
“There’s been a lot of change, are you ok?”
“You don’t seem yourself lately - want to talk about it?”
Actively listening to someone when they choose to confide in you about their mental health struggle can sometimes be harder than it seems, and saying less is generally better. The idea is to gently encourage the other person to share more to better understand their situation and allow them time to process what they’ve just shared with you.
“I’m here to listen if you want to talk more.”
“How are you feeling about that?”
“What’s it like for you at the moment?”
Encouraging someone to take action shouldn’t be a rushed or ‘quick fix’ response (except when thoughts of suicide are mentioned – see below for more information) and needs to involve the other person in the solution. This can be challenging, and Andrew noted often “goes against the instincts of veterinary professionals who are always trying to make things better”.
“What do you think is a first step that would help you through this?”
“What’s something you enjoy doing? Making time for that can really help.”
“Have you spoken to your doctor or another health professional about this?”
As Andrew shared, we don’t need to be professionals to support someone, we can be there in real time, on the ground, to help and get them to the right support. Checking in regularly and showing genuine care and concern can make a real difference.
“Just wanted to check in and see how you’re doing?”
“Have things improved or changed since we last spoke?”
“Do you need more support?”
With many helpful tips and resources, the webinar was an important reminder that we don’t need to be an expert to reach out to friends, colleagues and family members, being a great listener is more than enough.
Crisis care: if you feel the situation is more urgent and you’re worried about someone’s immediate safety or you think someone is having thoughts of suicide, don’t be afraid to ask them. Asking the question does not lead to suicide. Read more about having a conversation around suicide.
A recording of the webinar can be found here.
THRIVE is an industry-led veterinary wellness initiative that aims to support veterinarians and veterinary staff to lead satisfying, prosperous, and healthy careers: Ava.com.au/Thrive
AVA Telephone Counselling: 1300 687 327
The AVA Telephone Counselling Service is not an emergency or crisis line, but a first point of contact. They will discuss your concerns with you – physical and mental – and provide you with advice on what steps to take next. All calls are completely confidential and non-judgemental.
The service is available to AVA members, the vet professionals that work for them (who may not be members) and family members. It is available all day every day on 1300 687 327. The service can also arrange a counsellor to attend veterinary workplaces to help support staff after a traumatic incident.
Lifeline: 13 11 14
If you need urgent help, you should call Lifeline immediately. Lifeline provide 24/7 crisis support and suicide prevention services.
More services: ruok.org.au/findhelp